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Dear Kelly,

A Monthly Column written by Kelly Livingstone, founder of, and published in Truck News Magazine.
Do NOT copy without permission.

June 2005

Dear Kelly,
I have been reading you column each month. I think it’s quite lovely. I have a question about my husband and how I can help him to handle being away a little better. We do not have any children yet, so it is just the two of us, and when he calls me from the road, he seems so lonely. He has been doing this almost a year now and it has gotten better, but I know he tries to hide it too, so I am not sure how he really feels all the time. I miss him awfully, but try not to let it show too much. He took this job to help save money for a house and I don’t want to add any pressure to him. Do you have any suggestions on how I can help him to feel so not alone?
My man is missing me

Dear My man is missing me,
Thanks you for the sweet comments! The first thing I suggest is talk with him about this. Does he know how much you miss him? You may think that it is helping to hide it, but letting him know that you miss him too, may make him feel not so alone.
Can you go with him on a trip once in a while? If you aren’t working, or have some holiday time, hopping in the truck for a trip with him could be fun!
Send something personal or special with him. Something that you know will make him feel special and loved and thought of.
Buy a book of stamps for him. Ask him to buy and send you post cards from places that he stops when he can. This will give him and opportunity to write quick notes on them and to say to you some of the things that he may not say over the phone. It will also be a really nice keepsake and a record of his travels. Thirty years from now, it will sure be something wonderful that you two will have to look back on.
Speaking of the phone, do you talk often? Perhaps it may help to change how your phone goes normally go? Find some good jokes and keep them by the phone. Tell him a joke every time you talk. If you normally say a quick “I love you” or “I miss you” during the call, turn that comment around into a “You know, I really, really love you” or an “I miss you so much and can hardly wait until you are home”. If you don’t have cell phone, you may want to consider that.
Can he take a pet with him? Perhaps a furry friend on the road that he can talk to would help.
Tuck little things into his clothing or other things he is sure to use. A card, a note, a photo, a new t-shirt, a package of gum, a pencil or anything that would not normally be in his bag. Finds these small trinkets will be fun for him and he will know that you are thinking of him.
This is really not an easy thing to answer. The one behind the wheel has so many hours to think as they drive. We at home can keep busy doing things, even just reading a book can be a break from thinking about our partner. Doing things that remind him of you may not seem like the answer to him not missing you, but they may help him to know that you miss him too, and you are in this together.

Dear Kelly,
I heard a song on the radio the other day that was talking about truckers and driving. They were using all kinds of trucker words. I asked my husband about some of them that I could remember, but he didn’t even know all of them. Do you know where I can find out what they mean? The ones he didn’t know were swindle sheets and chicken coops. Do you know of a song like that?
Wanna talk trucker

Dear Wanna talk trucker,
I am pretty sure the song you are referring to is ‘Convey’. It was originally performed by C.W. McCall in the mid 70’s, but has been recently released by Paul Brandt. Swindle sheets are actually log books and chicken coops are weigh stations. If you have internet access, you can do a search for ‘trucker talk’ or ‘CB slang’ and you will find many places that have lists and explanations. You should also be able to find books, just ask at your local bookstore.

©2005 Kelly Livingstone
Please do not reprint without permission

More Dear Kelly

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August 2005
Summer ideas for children with Daddy on the road.
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July 2005
Not just "a trucker".
A Trucker's Husband.

June 2005
My man is missing me
Wanna talk trucker.

December 2004
Celebrating Alone
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More of the archives coming soon...

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Due to the amount of questions sent in, I am not able to answer all of them in the column. I do try to respond to as many as possible via email. Unless noted in the above form, by sending this form, you give and Truck News permission to publish your submission, in part or in whole, online and/or in print. Your real name and email will not be published unless used in the message body, and will only be used to contact you. All submissions may be edited for space restrictions, spelling and other guidelines. also reserves the right to use your submission for other related projects or online or print mediums as we see fit.
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