Dear Kelly,

A Monthly Column written by Kelly Livingstone, founder of atruckerswife.com, and published in Truck News Magazine.
Do NOT copy without permission.

July 2005

Dear Kelly,
My husband is a professional transport operator and I for one, am tired of all the people out there that refer to them as “just truckers”. He went to school to get his job. He has written or driven many tests and passed them to get where he is today. He is responsible for a vehicle that weighs 80,000 lbs and is worth more than some homes. I would love to see some of those people keep a log book and do all the calculations to figure out whether or not you need to rest or can continue to drive, I know it befuddles me. He is a responsible, clean, and courteous driver and would stop to help others should he see someone in need.
I am so proud of my husband. He trucks for miles and miles to deliver things people need! When I stop for even a split second to think about the things he gives up in life, I can’t help but think he is just an amazing person! My husband gives up seeing his baby girl grow up, her first steps and even her second birthday! He misses holidays, dinners at the table and even just a lot of those nights watching a movie with his wife. He makes a decent income, but we aren’t rich. He eats at crazy times of the day and night and goodness knows what he’s eating. He showers in strange truck stops and sleeps in a bunk in a rest stop. He drives that great big truck and a fifty three foot trailer and backs it into places I would have trouble getting my own 4 wheel truck into.
I just want everyone to know that I am proud of my husband and ALL truckers who keep the country moving and bring us our daily needs. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and may the wind always be at your back door.
A PROUD Trucker’s Wife

Dear A PROUD Trucker’s Wife,
I was so touched to read your letter. Thank you so much for sharing that with us.
I found this on the Transport Canada website. "Of all freight traffic, something approaching half makes its entire journey by truck, and most of the remainder that is hauled by train, ship or aircraft relies on truck transport at one or both ends of its trip." --Canada Transportation Act Review Panel, 2001
Thank you truckers!
Kelly

Dear Kelly,
Kudos on this column. I always enjoy reading. I am the opposite of most of your readers. I am a trucker’s husband. My wife drives and I stay at home. She was a trucker lady when I met her and I am a home care nurse. We have been together for almost six years now and other than the six months she took off after our baby was born, she has been on the road for 2 weeks at a time. It’s not an easy situation. Our son longs for her at night and I find it difficult to console him sometimes. He is almost 3 now and he talks to her on the phone every day. The problem is that he has become quite attached to his daycare ‘mom’. The last time my wife came home there was an ‘open house’ at the daycare. We showed up hoping to surprise him and my wife walked in and he looked over at her and ran back to the daycare worker. I know that this was extremely hard on my wife. She completely loves our son and this is her job. It is really hard for people to understand why she just doesn’t come off the road. When a man does it, it just doesn’t seem as bad to others. She was born to drive, and deciding to have a child was a thought out process. This isn’t something we took lightly, but it isn’t as easy as we thought.
Any ideas how to make them connect?
A trucker’s husband

Dear A trucker’s husband,
How wonderful to hear from the other side of the coin. Your son bonding with the daycare mom is completely normal, even for parents who work locally. A child spends anywhere from 8-10 hours a day, 5 days a week with this caregiver. That is a lot of time. Encourage your son to speak on the phone as often as possible with his mom. Do things with him to get ready for mom’s homecoming and have a photo of him and his mom in his room where he can see it. Anything that brings the two of them together whether she is on the road or at home will help keep that bond strong.
Kelly

©2005 Kelly Livingstone
Please do not reprint without permission

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